Brian Posehn, invitado de esta semana a Headbanger's Ball
lavrenti
¿Y quién es Brian Posehn? Pues parece ser que es un cómico norteamericano, de monólogos, y actor ocasional en películas como Dos tontos muy tontos y series como Friends o Seinfeld.
Comenzó a hacerse más famoso en Comedy Central dentro de un espacio llamado The Nerd Perspective, en cuyas actuaciones introducía chistes/críticas sobre el metal y, en especial, sobre la MTV.
El caso es que publicó en julio un disco, Live in: Nerd rage con una selección de monólogos en el sello Relapse Records donde canta un tema compuesto por Scott Ian de Anthrax y Stormtroopers of Death titulado Metal by Numbers. Llevaba un tiempo pensando como podía colar el vídeo por aquí y esa absurda noticia da la oportunidad.
Tiene puntos graciosos y cosas censurables (como sus chistes homófobos o sus referencias a los "retarded") pero es bueno que cada uno se cree su propia opinión ¬_¬ El vídeo está colgado en youtube pero sólo aquí podréis disfrutar de la letra (y en la página de la que la he copiado, bajo derecho de cita XD). A mí me gusta más el tema que está viendo en la tele que el suyo ¬_¬
VERSE 1:
They’ve killed METAL twice, but it will never really die!
It’s kind of like a zombie or even that Jesus guy…
So grab your friends, some instruments and start a metal band
Just sing about death, Egypt and wizards or rip off Ayn Rand
We’re coming to the end of the first verse…
Then comes the breakdown, a pretty chorus and then the second verse.
I know I just rhymed verse with verse
That’s because I’m sooo METAL, bitch, where’s your fucking purse?
PRE-CHORUS(BREAKDOWN):
BREAKDOWN!!! In this part it sounds like the singer wants to fight…
BREAKDOWN!!! Don’t be scared, the chorus will make it all alright
CHORUS:
Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3
Follow these rules and you will see
Cookie monster vocals or yell like a wookie
Metal by numbers, COOKIE, COOKIE, COOKIE
Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3
THIS IS THE GAY PART, with melody
Even a baby could do it, just give it a try
Just sound like Maiden or Metallica or Every Time I Die
SECOND VERSE:
I have to change my voice to make me sound (gang) MAD!
If I tried to sing clean it would make your ears (gang) SAD!
This is the (gang) GANG VOCAL and I’ll tell you the (gang) TRUTH!
It’s four sweaty dudes yelling in a (gang) BOOTH!
Music really sucks now Posers and trendy FOOLS
But compared to Coldplay and Nelly, EVEN SHITTY METAL RULES!
It’s metal by numbers, it’s not arithmetic
John Mayer, Kelly Clarkson…they all can suck my PENIS!
PRE-CHORUS(BREAKDOWN):
BREAKDOWN!!! In this part it sounds like the singer wants to fight…
BREAKDOWN!!! Don’t be scared, the chorus will make it all alright
CHORUS:
Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3
Follow these rules and you will see
Cookie monster vocals or yell like a wookie
Metal by numbers, COOKIE, COOKIE, COOKIE
Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3
THIS IS THE GAY PART, with melody
Even a monkey could do it, just give it a try
Copy Maiden or Metallica or Every Time I Die
MOSH PART:
(BUILD UP)
Here it comes! C’mon! All Right!
ARE YOU ALMOST READY??
Dammit! I missed it!
(SPOKEN) This is the mosh part! MOSH!!!
Or don’t. It’s your call. I just stand in the back and try not to get hit. Watch out for the shirtless white trash guys. They’ll punch you and they stink. And look out for the screamo kids practicing their karate kicks. Dude, you look gaytarded. Oh no. Here comes a giant Mexican - he looks really pissed. I wish everybody would put their shirts back on, it’s kind of gross. Is this part still going? Here comes the lead break…Oh, not yet. Here it comes… here it comes. GO!
SOLO(Jon Donais)
CHORUS:
Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3
Follow these rules and you will see
Cookie monster vocals or yell like a wookie
Metal by numbers, COOKIE, COOKIE, COOKIE!
Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3
THIS IS THE GAY PART, with melody
Even a retard could do it, JUST GIVE IT A TRY!
Steal from Maiden or Metallica or Every Time I Die